Lindy West doesn’t really need a signal boost from me, as she writes for Jezebel with a gazillion readers, but I love what she’s said here. She’s said it in words and in ways that I appreciate SO MUCH.
She’s hilarious as a writer. I love her use of prose, tone, and yeah, I like her snark cause she knows where to aim it.
“I just can’t stand the thought of her getting fucked by all those other guys.”
So you’re about to have sex with a woman you’re attracted to, you really want to have sex with her, but all you can think about is her getting pounded by tons and tons of dicks? That sounds like an entirely different issue.
“No! I just mean that I struggle with the same powerlessness and insecurity that all human beings do, so as a coping mechanism I take advantage of our culture’s patriarchal power structure and exorcize my feelings of worthlessness by perpetuating shame-based proprietary attitudes over women’s bodies. Basically I’m obsessed with controlling women’s lives because I can’t control my own.”
Oh, honey. I know.”
That’s just brilliance.
There is no such thing as purity unless you consider the idea of having love in one’s heart. Love for others, for self, compassion and empathy. Then sure, having a mystical amazing connection with someone who’s slept with loads of partners could be as pure as a baby’s first breath. And in opposition, if one has nothing but anger and cynicism in their heart, the first virginal voyage with a partner could be callous, dirty, and horrible.
It’s not about the action in that regard, it’s about the intent and connection and agreements you are making to each other.
Women are not gum, or toothbrushes, or flowers. We are just simply people. Like men.
Why is this so hard to understand? Thank you Lindy West for telling it straight up.