Asking You

If you read this blog, and I know at least 2 people do, what I’d love today is for you to introduce yourselves in comments and to tell me something wonderful that is going on today in your life, or something you need help with/support for. Or both, you don’t have to choose.

I’m asking this mostly because I was looking through the topics I had to write about and the ranges from the sad to seriously horrible. And while I believe things need to be written about, signal boosted, linked and brought to attention, sometimes I’d like something more connecting, personal, inspirational.

This way, people can either help you out or feel inspired to do something awesome. And we can get back to more difficult topics later in the week.

I’ll go first.

Hi, I’m Julie! Something wonderful that’s gone on today is that I felt validated about the power of dialogue and empathy rather than use of snark and assholery when it comes to connecting online. I’m not naive enough to believe it will always be effective, but I enjoy seeing in action when it does work.

And I got to eat red curry for lunch.

As for something I need help with, my kids seem to have been assaulted by some biting bug situation over the past two nights in their room. What is it? A spider? Chiggers from the woods? A hidden water supply raising mosquitoes? Tonight we will have to find out!

Seriously, they look a hot mess.

Feel free to leave a comment. Let’s see who is out there…



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34 responses to “Asking You

  1. KimH

    Hi Julie – today, I put earnest money down on the house I hope to make home for my daughter and I for some time, so that’s something hopeful. If we close successfully, I’d like to adopt a dog this summer. I’d love to have a bulldog but there’s lots of pits and mixed breeds that need us too. Whatever kind we get, he just has to be good with kids and cats.

    Also, I had french fries for lunch. With honey mustard. Happy Tuesday 🙂

    • I love french fries!!!! Any day with fries is a good day!

      I like Bulldogs too. I met the cutest puppy the other day. So sweet. I’m a fan of Boxers too but man do they have energy!

      • HeatherN

        Aw, my sister just got a boxer. At least, I think it’s a boxer…it looks like one.

  2. Okay, heck, I’ll go! Something wonderful? Living in Austin! Really, I am just loving the fact that being in the indie movie capital of the world is giving my daughter Emily so many opportunities to do what she loves. As for something I need help with? I want to make a career change, but being the sole support of a family of 6 with no nest egg is making that very very hard to figure out.

  3. HeatherN

    Helloo there! Love this idea, Julie. Also, I read your bit about the biting bug as though it were a movie promo. So I’m going to go with a movie answer: it’s a plague of mutant mosquitoes which a mad scientist has been genetically engineering next door. 🙂

    I am HeatherN, differentiated from all the other Heathers by the use of my last initial. If you are reading this and are a Heather and your last initial is also an N, get a new one…this one is MINE. 🙂

    Let’s see…as for something good…oo I finally have finalised my idea for my PhD proposal. And, in a fit of absolute brilliance, I went with something positive and buildy rather than take-downy and critiquey. (That’s right, made up words when talking about a PhD proposal. Aw, yeah). Basically, my plan is to conduct a survey/interviews of trans* people about their internal experiences of gender. I’m really not familiar of anything like this being done on a large scale…just individual memoirs from trans* people (which are awesome, but unfortunately still just individual stories). I figure, our society’s conception of what it means to be trans* is all tied up in medical jargon that was created by cis people..let’s see how trans* people view and talk about themselves. (i.e. Is the whole man-trapped-in-a-woman’s-body and woman-trapped-in-a-man’s-body, really all there is to it?) I just need to figure out exactly which department this fits in best and find a supervisor. 🙂 I’m thinking probably anthropology, even though I’d be looking at western society. Sociology might fit better, though.

    And thing I could use help with…well if anyone knows anything at all about what I was talking about above, holler at me. 🙂

  4. My dear friend Lori just emailed me this as her WP access is wonky:

    “Julie, I am having trouble logging in and posting, so I’m putting my comment here in the thread, and will try again to figure out how to post it on the actual blog. ” Hi, I’m Lori. I’m happy because my daughter comes home from college today, and we are writing a book together that we will do a final revision of and submit in about a week! It is about how mothers can teach media literacy to girls through the vehicle of mother-daughter book clubs, helping them overcome some of the biggest challenges facing girls and women today. So, I’m very excited to be almost finished with this project that has taken me a year, and to have my 21-year-old daughter as a contributing author. And I’m not just plugging my book! It is that this is really what is going on for me today, and the idea of using my voice as a writer to help girls and women is seriously amazing. That my daughter’s voice is part of the book is even more exciting! What I need help with is that my two cats have lately become very needy, following me everywhere, and yowling all night. It is driving me crazy and I need a “cat whisperer” to help me figure out the problem! This was a good idea Julie!””

    I can’t wait for the book!

    • HeatherN

      Oo, about the cats…are they spayed/neutered? Male or female? I’m not a cat whisperer myself, but I know one I can consult.

  5. Hi everybody! I’m Joe… and good things? My wife started her new job today, which means we’re not going to get evicted in June. It is also lower stress, which is happy for both of us. I’m drinking Mountain Dew Throwback with REAL SUGAR, which is a rare treat, and for dinner tonight I’m going to tempura the whole damn kitchen. White mushrooms AND baby bellas!

    The bad? I’ve been without insurance for the last 2 years, which means no antidepressants. I’ve been self-medicating with alcohol, with mixed results.

    • OMG I love tempura.

      I”ve got depression too though I hate taking meds. I do but I hate it. Alcohol seems to make things worse at times. Like…in the moment? Great! In the morning, sadz for a long time.

      I’ve been trying to incorporate more exercise but often I feel too tired to start.

      I’m glad your wife got a gig. That’s good news.

  6. danielleparadis

    Hi you know me! I read you! Getting the lurkers to speak can be hard. I hope it isn’t bed bugs.

  7. Hi! I actually have several aliases, but this one works for me. I enjoy reading your thoughts and being exposed to more than what I come across in my normal day to day.

    Today, we had Thai food (pad see ewe) at one of our favorite places. I always order it the same way and it was just perfect.

    My little one is one my life’s passions and every milestone she hits, every discovery she makes, every conversation that illustrates how many connections she’s making in her head…just blows my mind. A four and a half year old, she amazed me when she completed a 150 piece puzzle just last week! My living room floor is covered with completed puzzles ranging from 24 pieces to 150 pieces. It’s beautiful.

    I live with the guilt that I knowingly hold us both back because of my fear of what could happen if she accidentally ingests one or more of the foods she’s severely allergic to. Whatever I am comfortable with her doing, I let her do as much as she wants of it. But, she could do so much more…

    • Oh allergies! Terrifying I know! We love our little ones so much. Sounds like you are helping her be amazing. I love Thai food too! God, it’s so amazing! (Iactuallylikeallfood!)

  8. Hi I’m Holly. I’m in Phoenix for family stuff. This is the place where I grew up and kinda hate. My experience is it has no soul, no culture, nothing even slightly funky. Today I discovered a new part if this town that looks like Austin invaded it. Bookstores and vintage clothing and coffee and bars and people who are interested in: AWESOME THINGS! Yay Phoenix- it’s about time.

    I’m struggling with complacency. Grr. I’ve been worrying lately that I’ve blown my wad prematurely, and now it’s certainly downhill. Fear is a great liar.

    Julie, I’m glad you’re doing this, because I read your blog and it’s been so dark lately. Thanks for lightening it up for a bit.

    • Agreed Holly. I thought today, OMG I don’t want to write another post on …..and what can inspire me and then I thought…YOU ALL CAN! So I’m going to let the method be the medicine and make things as balanced as possible. It’s important for our mental health. I’ve never visited Phoenix but I”m glad you are having more fun this time.

      You have not blown anything! You’ve got such amazing stuff happening for you, but you are right. Fear does lie. Man, we should have a workshop on that!

  9. Hi, I am Archy (real name kept a secret to online viewers:P).
    I love electronics, robotics, anything aerospace. Give me a billion dollars and I will create a company that researches the hell out of cybernetics, exo-skeletal suits, n other fun robotics. My dream is to be able to add more limbs to the body (soldering is a pain with only 2 hands, need 3 or 4!), and also optic nerve interface to cameras and a heads up display (terminator meets predator style but more peaceful purposes).

    I just finished building my new RC helicopter tonight and am keen to fly it, that’s my awesome. Topics that I am interested in in regards to what you are asking for would be social anxiety disorder, conversation skills, meeting new people, body language, consent (especially regarding the stage from 1 drink to tipsy to when the consent cuts off), depression, ADHD, abuse (as in anti-abuse stuff), bullying.

  10. Did you know I’ve had two English bulldogs in my life?? Love them!

  11. What a lovely idea! My name is Kelly, and something wonderful that is going on in my life, though it didn’t happen today but rather last night, is that we began rehearsals for Company, the musical The Guy and I are in this summer! Although I have danced before in a number of musicals, I have never actually sung solo in one or acted at all, so something I need help with is confidence and the ability to “let go” and find my performance.

  12. Hi, I’m Ashley. Something wonderful going on in my life is my new job. It’s perfect for me and makes me feel very capable. I’ve also made a new friend whom I ride the bus with every day on my way to work. She and I are meeting for tea this week.

    I could use some help with my writers block. It’s making me touchy. Or rather, I am allowing it to make me touchy.

    Thanks for the opportunity to share, Julie.

    • Hey there lady! Do you ever just do writing exercises like…free association kind of writing or picking an object and having to describe them? I use a lot of improv in my life and I’ll do that with writing too. Ping me if you want to talk about it.

  13. Hi! I’m Amy. I’m new here. Here I am.

    Something wonderful. I got to see Stephen Sondheim speak tonight, and he’s one of my idols, and he was just as amazing as I’d always hoped he was. So, there’s that.

    I don’t know what I need help with, so probably that means I need help with asking for help, because I was brought up not to ask for help because it shows WEAKNESS! And you are not WEAK, Amy! Dammit! Sigh.

    • I love Sondheim!!! He’s very hard to sing! I hate the whole weakness thing. I get it totally. Read some Brene Brown, it helped me reframe a huge amount around vulnerability and where courage comes from. 🙂

  14. Lorelei

    Hi Julie! Lorelei in Seattle, still reading along after all these years…

    My winter depression is hanging on tight this year, and I’m really struggling to just do what I need to do. But I picked some lilacs (my all-time favorite flower) and they are making my apartment smell amazing. Little things.

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